Andrology!

Who knows what that means? :)




That means that in a few years there might be more than one me :-D
So yes, I went to donate my sperm. Well... they need to do all sorts of tests but I already gave them sample so they can do some of them.

First question is: why I decided to do that?
I need money, I need a lot of money so I was thinking what are my options to get some. I don't want to find a job, at least not now, so this just seemed like a good idea because I can get 15000kč for 10 batches (have a better word? tell me :) which is quite a lot for doing nothing.
You might ask if it's a good idea, if I'm not worried that there will be my kids somewhere in the world. Definitely no! Because I know I'm great so the more of my kids is there in the world the better for the world :-D
And I'm not worried they will find me later when they grow up because I don't mind at all meeting them. I refuse to pay for them if they ask but knowing them would be weird and awkward but I don't mind.

Second: what do I need to do that?
In Czech you need to be 18-35 years old, you need to have high school with maturita or higher education and that's pretty much it for start.
Obviously you'll fill out forms, take tests and you need to prove you're the right person. I'll explain that more later.
Basically what you need to do is to call them, make an appointment and them cum.
Ouch!

So I did all that and today I visited the hospital. I went to the building, started looking around and I apparently looked so confused some random woman asked where I need to go. I said I have an appointment about donating my sperm. She just sent me to the reception. Which I would do two seconds later anyway but I found quite strange that she just came to me and asked what I'm looking for.
Anyway I went to the second floor (important, remember that) and I was told to wait a few minutes. Then a young guy (probably the only male in this place) came and gave me two papers. One with neccessary information I should read and a second was a form to fill out.
Very strange think about the form was that they didn't ask what kind of person I am. The only info about me was: age, heigh, weight, BMI, colour of hair and eyes. Plus only two questions that would matter to me if I was choosing a parent of my child. The questions were: interests, so I wrote music, physics and books; occupation, so I wrote "currently unemplyed, preparing to study".
That's it! I was very surprised by that because this doesn't seem enough to me. They might be asking more questions later but for now that's all they need and I was never told there will be any psychological tests/exams so I actually doubt they'll ever ask for more. Weird...

After that I had to fill out the rest of the form which was only about my health. Typical questions I guess: any diseases/cancer running in family, allergies, operations, medication, number of kids, transfusions, tattoos, piercings etc.  and then If I smoke, drink and use drugs. I explained the guy how it is and that I don't know what to fill out but he just said to put no to all of them. Sweet!
Anyway he explained to me all the tests I'll be taking, how long it's going to take, how much I could get and basically all the neccesities.

After that the fun part came. We went out and then down. To the first floor, to the ground floor and then he took me to the basement. We were going through several strange looking door untill we got to The Room :-D
It was an underground small room with bricks still visible on some places like the ceiling. On the left was a mirror and a wash basin; in front of me was a couch with a paper on it and a TV and on the right was a small table with paper, sticker, pen, TV remote and small container. Above the table were pornographic magazines. The guy told me that I need to fill out the short form about me and "how it went". Really! There was a question if I used a lubricant, where I did it (apparently you can do it at home) and if everything is in the container (?).
The guy left and I started looking around. I browsed the magazines-boring and a bit used but not yet in the disgusting way. I read a funny note about what and how should I do all this. They said if it takes more than 30 minutes I should give up. And also said I should not touch the inside of a sterile sperminal/sperminary (I found out that there's a word for a "container for urine" and it's urinal/urinary so maybe I can use this as well) and clean my hands and to throw the paper on the couch to the bin after I'm done. I tried to turn on the TV and I spend about half of the whole time in there doing this but it didn't work and I couldn't turn the dvd on. No idea why.
Anyway after that I did my bussiness. You do not want the details, right? :-D

I put the sticker with my name onto the sperminary, put that into a bag I got and I went back to the second floor. I gave the form and the bag to some girl and I waited a while to make another appointment. I did that and I was gone.

Overall: It was very funny situation but otherwise it all went well. I talked to one guy and he was helpful and nice. And the brief conversations with all the women weren't strange or awkward. Which is really nice to see, I wasn't nervous, more like curious and I was glad to find that there was no reason to be nervous. Now let's just hope it will work out because apparently they only accept about 1/10 of all the people so the tests they do are pretty hard to pass. Well we'll see in a few weeks. I'll keep you updated if you want :-D